The Motorist is seeking interns for the following positions:
- Social Media Coordinator
- Merch Model
- Topical List Writer
About the Silent Motorist Media Internship Program
As an intern, you will be expected to fulfill all assignments and meet all applicable deadlines in a timely manner. You will be given specific weekly tasks with the understanding that they are to be executed in the Silent Motorist name.
Interns will not be rewarded monetarily, but there are certain perks that come with the job. If you’re a merch model, you’ll be given select merchandise to wear and advertise on social media. After you’ve taken selfies, the swag is yours to keep.
If you’re a writer for the Motorist, you’ll be able to get your hands on free copies of the latest albums, books and movies.
After a six-month trial period, we will evaluate your progress and see where we stand. If you’ve done a good job that makes us look good in the process, you’ll get a pat on the head, a cookie and a letter of recommendation.
I pity those who don’t do right by us, for they will get a stern eyeball licking and some very choice words from our friend Wiggins. He will unzip his bondage mask and spit in your mouth and you will swallow it like the lazy lapdog that you are!
So go on, mutants! Send us your dirty pictures, your death threats, your CVs or STDs or resumes and let’s job all over each other.
Email model pics, applications and cover letters to: firstname.lastname@example.org. Be sure to write your name and the internship you are applying for in the Subject Line of your email.